The seas, the seas and the seas

There are reasons why I love the seas.

First, seafood. I love it as much as I love the meat of land critters. Love it more than fresh water ones. Tastes extremely varied: savoury, sweet, pungent. For me, the fishiness is a lot more tolerable than muddied-water taste of fresh water fish. Seafood also makes perfect seasoning. Too bad it’s relatively scarce. I can talk about this whole day long.

But, nourishment isn’t the only one. For years, I’ve been having this inexplicable desire to live near the sea. No, this has nothing to do with my love of seafood.

Living near the sea doesn’t guarantee its abundance and quality. Not every cubic of seawater is biologically vibrant. The water’s rough for fishermen. Marine aquaculture is a difficult practice. Marine pollution is constant. So, why do I have such desire?

Well, the prospect of a thoroughly landlocked living unnerves me. My entire life, I was never that faraway from the sea. Sometimes, it did take hours to reach the nearest beach. Even then, it was more about the traffics than the distances themselves. Also, Indonesia is the biggest archipelago in on earth. My upbringing is an obvious contributing factor.

It’s one reason why I’m reluctant to live in continental countries. Many of their cities are inland, way inland. Chicago and Toronto, for examples, aren’t that far from the Great Lakes. But, they are lakes. Even saltwater ones won’t do much for me. They have to be wide open seas. I can’t imagine living far from them.

Actually, I can. In my mind, such inland living would feel isolating. The bigger it is, the more intense the feeling would be. I would be literally insane! Pure paranoia, caused by my emotional dependence on the seas…

…And I just used the ‘crazy’ card. As volatile as I am, I don’t suffer from any emotional disorders. Besides, I have never actually lived right next to a sea. I barely have any mental mementos from the beaches. Emotional dependence doesn’t make sense in my case. So, why am I attracted to those foul-smelling bodies of water?

Their spirits, maybe? Why would I be enticed by those personally unfeasible and revolting entities in the first place? Metaphysics always encourages me to see beyond the unappealing and deceptive physicality.

For start, our understanding about the deep sea is minuscule compared to the outer space one. We know little about the critters living down there. The ones we’ve discovered are usually grotesque and alien. So, why is marine biology significant here? It deals with actual physicality. It’s not metaphysical. Well, the question’s already answered…twice.

We know little about deep sea critters and the ones we know are often grotesque and alien. The marine spirits still exude strong mysterious and freakish auras. Things I easily fall for.

I love mysteries. I love to be ‘tormented’ by overwhelming curiosity. The sensation encourages me to not take knowledge for granted, to be humble about my understanding of life, to always be keen about learning.

I also love the ‘grotesque’ and the ‘alien’. They call out my judgy temperament, rebel against the mist of traditionalism that still plagues my mind, challenge what I perceive as ‘normal’. Who knows? Maybe I’ll end up loving them.

How can I expand my horizon when I’m already satisfied by its narrow vastness? How can I improve my vision when I’m comfortable with my worn-out lenses? We eagerly dismiss the mysterious and the offbeat as cock-teasing and ‘abnormal’, respectively. It’s destructive to our state of mankind, more than we like to admit.

As much as I’m captivated by the marine spirits, they also taunt me. They make me feel vulnerable as a living being. I said something about how I have actually never lived right next to the sea. Well, I want to keep that way.

Visiting a beach is different from living on one. Living there means you’re at the sea’s mercy. You’ll be among the first pitiful humans to suffer its wrath. But, living further inland won’t make you safer. The sea still can torment you from faraway, albeit slightly less cruelly. Only slightly. I’m willingly submit myself to one rightful authority that is nature.

Nature. As a whole entity, it is an almighty menace that radiates mysterious and freakish charm…similar to my illustration of the seas. So, my sentiment to every territory in nature should be alike. Yet, the seas are the only ones that greatly shape my metaphysics.

Don’t get me wrong. I also appreciate the other territories. I acknowledge their innate power on mankind. But, except for the outer space, none of them evoke equally compelling (and pretentious) sentiment from me. As I have said many times, the seas, the seas and the seas.

I always thought the reasons for my marine obsession are too enigmatic to unearth. That or I let the spirits haunt my life, turning me too dainty about my dwelling. Either can be true. Can be.

Perhaps I deem myself too admiringly. Perhaps I love to perceive myself as a profound and mystifying individual who grasps what others fail to, whom others fail to hold in high esteem. The mirror I have been using all my life is possibly an illusive one.

I love seafood. I have very mild emotional dependence on the sea. They are equally valid as the probably causes. I shouldn’t be belittling just because of their supposed futility. I’m a humbug. Bear in mind how I loathe humans who belittle the ‘mysterious’ and the ‘grotesque’.

Intellectualism is a must…and so is being down-to-earth.